Overview
Grief is universal. At some point, everyone experiences sadness at least once. Whether it’s the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, the end of a relationship, or any other change that changes life as you know it.
Grief is very personal. It is not very neat and linear. It doesn’t follow any deadlines or schedules. You may cry, get angry, withdraw, or feel empty. None of these things are unusual or wrong.
Everyone grieves differently, but there are commonalities in the stages and sequence of emotions experienced during grief.
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The 7 stages of grief may be the best known, but they are far from the most popular stages of grief theory. There are many more, including seven stages. Below we’ve explained 5 stages of grief.
The 5 stages of Grief
According to some famous researchers, the five stages of pain are:
- Rejection
- Anger issues
- Bargaining Habit
- Depression
- Acceptance
Here’s what you need to know about each.
Stage 1: Rejection
Grief is an overwhelming feeling. It is not unusual to react to sudden strong feelings by pretending that the loss or change did not happen.
Rejection gives you time to absorb the news and begin to process it gradually. This is a standard defense mechanism that lets you know the seriousness of the situation.
When you come out of denial, your hidden emotions will surface. You are facing many sorrows that you have denied. This is part of the grieving journey, but it can be difficult.
Stage 2: Anger issues
Although denial is considered a coping mechanism, anger is a hidden effect. Anger hides a lot of feelings and pain that you carry.
This anger may be directed at others, such as your deceased loved one, ex, or old boss. You can also direct your anger at inanimate objects. Although your rational brain knows that the target of your anger is not at fault, your emotions are currently too intense to act.
Anger can be disguised as bitterness or resentment. Anger may not be apparent.
Not everyone faces this unpleasant situation. Others can stay long there. However, once the anger subsides, you can start to think rationally about what’s going on and feel the emotions you’ve pushed aside.
Stage 3: Bargaining Habit
When you are grieving, you can feel that you are vulnerable and helpless. In moments of intense emotion, it is not unusual to look for ways to regain control or to wish that you could influence the outcome of the event. During the grief negotiation stage, you may have a lot of “what ifs” and “what ifs.”
To heal or ease grief, religious figures often try to make an agreement or promise with God or a higher power. Bargaining is a line of defense against feelings of sadness. It helps to set aside grief, confusion, or pain.
Stage 4: Depression
Anger and agreement can be very active, while depression can feel calm and sad.
In the early stages of grief, you may run away from your emotions and try to stay one step ahead of them. However, at this point, you can accept them and work with them more healthily. You may also isolate yourself from others to cope with the loss entirely.
This does not mean that depression is mild or well-defined. Like other forms of grief, depression can be complex and confusing. This may seem overwhelming. You may feel foggy, heavy, and confused.
Depression can be the inevitable landing of any loss. However, if you feel stuck or unable to move through the grieving process, you may want to talk to a mental health professional or enroll into a mental wellbeing app such as connectedminds. A therapist can help you through this process.
Step 5: Acceptance
Acceptance is not necessarily a happy or elevated state of sadness. It doesn’t mean you’ve gotten over the grief or loss. However, you have accepted it and understand what it means in your life now.
At this point, you may feel completely different. It was expected that you had made significant changes in your life, improving your attitude towards many things.
See, acceptance as a way to realize that there can be more good days than bad. It could be worse as well – and that will be completely OK.
7 stages of grief
The seven stages of grief are another popular model to explain the many complex experiences of loss. These seven steps:
Shock and denial: This is a state of disbelief and a sense of numbness.
Pain and guilt: You may feel that the loss is unbearable and make life difficult for others because of your feelings and needs.
Anger and agreements: You can tell God or a higher power that you will do whatever they ask, whether it helps you eliminate the feeling or situation.
Depression: This can be a period of loneliness and isolation in which you dwell on dysfunction and loss.
Upward Rotation: In this stage, the levels of sadness, anger, and pain decrease, and you are in a more peaceful and relaxed state.
Rebuild and work through it: You can put the pieces of your life back together and start moving forward.
Acceptance and Trust: This is the gradual acceptance of a new way of life and a sense of possibility for the future.
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Grief Affecting Mental Condition
Avoiding, ignoring, or denying your ability to express grief can help distract you from the pain of the loss you are experiencing. But its presence does not disappear. And you can’t avoid sadness forever.
Over time, unresolved grief can develop into physical or emotional symptoms that affect your mental health and its condition. To heal and let go of loss, you have to deal with it. If you are struggling to cope with your grief, seek counseling to help you manage.
Although each person experiences grief differently, knowing the different stages of grief can help you anticipate and understand some of the reactions, you may experience during the grieving process. This can help you understand your needs during suffering and find ways to meet them. Understanding the grieving process can help you work toward acceptance and healing.